Hope is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul
And sings the tune without the words
And never stops at all.
― Emily Dickinson
Life doesn’t stop while the sun keeps rising and setting over the horizon relentlessly. Days vanish quickly. And with these the foundation of our “me” can shift and turn between a whisper and an action, a declaration with such an impact that leaves a crack deep down on our core changing the way we behave and react.
With a handful of hurry & little time we flew to our homeland. We didn’t sleep in the day of the departure. The flight left in the early dawn and we still had about an hour drive. I was so tired that after putting Darwin below the front seat I just remember murmuring something to Jorge, blinking and seeing myself in the middle of the clouds.
It felt so good to hug my dearest family. I was missing Zuca so much! We took a morning walk by Costa Nova beach which as has been happening the last few years the beach is receding against the ever encompassing ocean. It is sad to see. To remember what it was. To think how it should be. To wonder what it might become if nothing is done. Zu is watching the ocean with me, perhaps he is also drifting in thoughts. The sound of waves bursts strongly and I felt so small.
One afternoon Jorge and I went to a bookstore and bought a couple of books. And in-between other things that happened during that period of time, I was diagnosed with a Tumor in my left eye. I suppose news always come split in good and bad; it is benign but it’s a degeneration and an incurable eye condition, it can grow and lead to loss of sight… and as a person that can see so well it’s frightening to think on something like that.
Sometimes I feel like I’m in a limbo with my hands holding on to hope.